Social Security Ends Phone Claims, Forcing 45-Mile Trips for Seniors

Well, isn’t this just fantastic news for America’s seniors? The Social Security Administration has come up with yet another stellar idea to make life easier for our elderly population – by eliminating phone applications for retirement and survivor benefits. Because nothing says “we care about accessibility” quite like forcing millions of Social Security beneficiaries to either navigate the digital wilderness or physically trek to an office.

Making Life “Easier” for the Most Vulnerable

According to the Center on Budget and Policy Priorities (CBPP), approximately 6 million Americans might now need to travel up to 45 miles to reach a Social Security office. How convenient! Especially for those with mobility issues or those living in rural areas without reliable transportation options. But hey, exercise is good for the elderly, right?

Since April 8, seniors can no longer apply for Social Security benefits by phone. They must either use the internet – which every 85-year-old is naturally proficient with – or visit a field office in person. The SSA claims this change is for fraud protection. Because obviously, the biggest security threat facing our nation is grandma trying to collect her retirement benefits over the telephone.

Wait Times: The SSA’s Version of Entertainment

If you’re lucky enough to secure an appointment at your local Social Security office, congratulations! You’ve won the privilege of waiting an average of 28 days for an in-person meeting. Or if you prefer, you can spend a mere two and a half hours on hold when calling their offices. Think of all the crossword puzzles you can complete during that time!

“Not everyone drives, particularly seniors or people with disabilities,” explained Kathleen Romig from CBPP, stating what should be painfully obvious to anyone who’s ever met an elderly person applying for Social Security.

Survivor Benefits: Extra Hoops for the Recently Bereaved

The cherry on top? Social Security survivor benefits can’t even be applied for online. So if your spouse has just died, the SSA has thoughtfully provided you with a grief-management activity:

• Navigating public transportation to your nearest Social Security office
• Potentially traveling to another county
• Waiting weeks for an available appointment
• Bringing all required documentation in person

“All of those people need to go in person to apply for benefits because there is no online option for that,” Romig pointed out, in what must be the understatement of the year.

But don’t worry – the SSA assures us that phone access remains available for “general inquiries.” So you can still call to ask what time they close right before you embark on your 45-mile journey to file your Social Security claim. How thoughtful of them!